TUESDAY-Woke up at 445 am to get Jen into shower (takes her 30 min from start to finish). Loaded bags into car and off we left at 530 (more like 45 min for Jen). Got to airport no issues but running a little late. Went to kiosk and early printed boarding passes and stood in line to check bags. I now believe people who are smarter and plan better get screwed because the people that do not know how to use kiosk or what to do get immediate service and cut the line of people that know what the f they are doing. Its like college savings; if you save for your kid and plan ahead, you get no financial help but if you do nothing and have nothing, you get help. Not really fair in my opinion.
Paid the $100 overweight charge for Jen's bag but not mine. I took out all my hanging clothes. that is crazy expensive. I asked if i could just pay 129 and get another seat for my bag instead of 100 for 5 lbs over. Now at least I am 100 in the black.
Maybe we should have gotten a room the night before at airport hotel like Chris, its just an expense anyway, a write off some may say. Now onto the TSA pre check line that has now become longer and slower then the regular line. It is crazy that people walk up and still are not ready to go through. Went to the book store because Jen was sure I could get a notebook to write my blog notes but of course they did not have. The lady could not understand what we meant by a blank book. Then it occurred to me that the person that buys a gun magazine at the airport book store should be monitored like the guy that buys a catcher in the rye copy in a book store.
Boarded plane and got both arm rests which was great but the 100 year old lady in front of me decided to put her purse under her seat so her legs had room. I was trying to be nice but if she had anything breakable in there, so be it. We slept most of the way which is normal for me but awesome. The guy next to Jen (we always sit isle next to each other so people don't know we are together) was jumbling with his huge head phone case while balancing a full to the rim hot coffee over Jen. It looked like a trombone case it was so big. Sometimes I feel like I am in an episode of Larry David, Curb when these things go on.
There is always one guy that when you land and the ding goes off, immediately gets up and walks forward 3 isles. Wtf, what is the advantage besides being rude is the point? Got to rental car place (horrible in Ft. Lauderdale) and decided to treat ourselves to a luxury upgrade (its only an expense or write off, chris-actually they upgraded for free because they ran out of our size). Anyway, went back into the red by getting convinced to buy the insurance but I am going to get my 90 dollars worth of that upgrade before I turn that car in. Had lunch at the HOBO Cafe (abba) and it was great.
Immediately stopped at Key Largo to look at one of the only Blackfin boats in the USA because we are taking the boat line on and I have not seen them yet (can you say business write off?).
Took Jen for a walk and the devastation here is horrible. Piles of debris all over the place. Got back in time to see the sunsetting over the septic tank at our hotel. Had a few drinks and listened to some music before dinner at the Steak and Lobster house. It was awesome. I woke up and had a dream that I ate a double order of Creme Brûlée served in a carved out pineapple. Got home and had the air conditioner fight which I lost until 1 am when I secretly won. NO SPILLS TODAY.
One more quick note; Jen and I watch a lot of TV and especially navy seals shows. That being said, I often refer to Jen as a tier 3 or green team operator while I refer to myself as a tier 1 (seal team six) operator. Just an FYI.
WEDNESDAY-KEY WEST today after a walk through Duck Key. The devastation here is terrible. Some houses completely destroyed, some not touched. Debris all over the road waiting to be picked up. Beautiful drive down to Key West and had a great lunch at Carolines. All the places we have eaten are better then the next and not super expensive. Stopped by Ron Jon Surf Shop to try and demo the one wheel which I think I am going to become a dealer for. They wouldn't let me demo (assholes). Now for the best thing ever. I decided to smoke a cigar which was a win win solution because as I enjoy my cigar, I cannot obviously go into all the shops with Jen, so I sit outside and wait. Talk about a great idea.
Every single heckler selling skin cream caught Jen in their nets. It got to the point I had to cross the street with her to keep her from buying more skin cream. Continued shopping and then had to hustle to get back to watch sunset at Mallory Square.
Now to the fun part. Jen booked a drag show which neither of us have ever been to. Funny but apparently, Key West is known for this. Also funny that the extremities of the US are places where gays flock (P town, Key West). Anyway, we sat next to a couple who were about 80 years old and did not understand the show they were watching at all. All I wanted was not to get singled out (didn't work). Spent all my money on tips. We did have the best drink waiter ever! Pictures will say it all.
Side note. Went into a shop that sold Simply Southern and found my shirt in the girls section. Asked the associate if it was a girls shirt and guess what? Gabby was right, it is a girls shirt. I would hate to see the girl that fits into it though.
Shout out to Patty who is an avid reader of the blog.
THURSDAY- Went for a walk and saw the mecca of Iguana's. They are living in an old bridge and it is like a bunch of rats. they are everywhere and always come near me. I was trying to nap by the pool and they would sneak closer every time I closed my eyes. I would open them and they would be a little closer but not moving. Very scary. We had a relaxing afternoon hanging by the pool.
Had a close call but avoided argument with Jen. Not sure how I avoided but still a win for me.
Talked to my mom, who gave me the full list of what she packed for my Dad for the cruise. They are packing in a carry on for the week. Jen and I have 2 60 lb huge bags.
Next was a sunset cruise on a catamaran with 3 old ladies. I had to help them move all over the boat and I would love to see what they do with all the pictures they took. Seems to be the norm; Jen and I are 25 years younger then everyone else traveling. It was really nice and had a great time.
Off to dinner in Islamorada at the Moorings Resort, where they film Bloodline (one of our favorite shows). The setting was awesome, the food, not so much and very pricy. Stopped on way home to get the three bottles of wine for my dad (allowed to bring on cruise ship). We will leave Marathon in morning and meet them in Miami before cruise starts at 11.
Shout out to all the people in CA and the fires. My friend Chris sent a picture on Insta and it looks like the apocalypse (Julians words). Oh, Julians new car will be delivered today, hopefully-a new blueberry.
CUBA NEXT
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