Walnuts for breakfast, this must be a joke

***I may have been over served at the restaurant when I wrote the last blog, so if i repeated anything or went out of order it could be because of that.  Still scored an A+

Sunday- Headed back to wine country to visit my wine club, Joseph Phelps.  They are not accepting any visitors until end of November so had to pull out the wine club card to get an appointment.   First, we went to Muir Woods to go for a proper hike with Pam.  Had to get there by 8:30 before all the parking is taken (there are signs all over the freeways saying Muir Woods Parking is full).   So foggy but so cool.  The trees here are fat and super tall and we (Jen, myself and Pam) decide to go for a hike (of course straight up hill for 2.2 miles).  It was great and the best part was Pam carried her coffee cup the entire time.  When I saw her in the am, I said to Jen, we may need to exercise later because we had Jessee and Alex and now Pam with a coffee cup (seemed like it was going to be a leisurely stroll more then a hike) BUT Pam hiked the entire time with her cup of coffee and at the end it still had coffee in it.  Very impressive.   I am adopting Pam's line or her husband, Chris's line actually.  I have to take Jen out for a walk everyday or she goes bananas.  Great hike 5.5 miles.   Met Jessee and Alex back at gift shop and headed to Mill Valley for brunch at the Beer Garden (Highly recommended by Pam and other people waiting outside).  The town was so nice and we sat down right at 11:30 AM.

Ok, now the weird part.  The brunch menu has no eggs or any breakfast food on it.  It is a typical CA menu with the craziest combinations of items.    For breakfast, I had the walnuts and salt!  Yes, a bowl of 10 walnuts, a nut cracker and salt in the bottom of the skillet.  All for the bargain price of $14.  This is when Jen said to me, they have to all be in the kitchen laughing at us.  "Lets serve them walnuts, like thanksgiving day and make them crack them and rub them in salt.  We will just charge them 500% more then they cost and it will seem like a trendy thing.  They will eat them."  Well the joke was on us, we ate them, crazy (incidentally, we were driving to Napa later and saw bushels of walnuts for $5.00 that could have made this walnut dish for 500 people).  We also asked for salt (as you all must know we salt the f out of everything) and they gave us a perplexed look, like "whats salt?"   They came back with a little tiny thimble with 4 grains of salt in it.  We had to ask 2 more times for refills.  I did like my coffee and asked the server if I could have a refill and once again got the perplexed look--"you want another set up of coffee?"  I replied, "yea, I guess." $4 later I got my "refill."

We stick out like sore thumbs here.  We are wearing shorts (it is hot) but everyone is wearing pants and Patagonia jackets.  Plus, everyone is super thin (as you would imagine eating 10 walnuts instead of a western omelet, bacon, toast and home fries).  Also, everyone is walking a dog.

The commitment to biking in the US today is unbelievable but in CA it is a heightened level.  You would think the Tour de France was everywhere in CA.  Sponsorships, matching outfits, tight fitting pants on MEN and the most expensive bikes you have ever seen.   Our bikes are still on back of the RV and completely diesel covered (will need to put paint suits on to ride them) but they fit the picture and maybe we will will use in Utah.

Did you know you need to ask someone to pet their dog?  I did not, and learned the hard way.

Went back to Flag to shower and get ready to go to our confirmed appointment at the exact time of 2:30 PM at Joseph Phelps which is 1 hour away.  Said we had to leave at 1:15 and that is exactly when Jen and I were ready to leave sitting in the car.  Jessee and Alex (we love them to death) are so F-ing slow (sorry aunt mary but i need to stress slow).  Granted the jeep is really hard to get into and out of but we have not left the jeep once without having to go back and get something we forgot.   We ended up now giving them a 5 minute warning that we are getting out so they can gather their phones, wallets, etc.

Joseph Phelps was awesome.  So high end and beautiful.  We wanted to see one large Winery (Mondavi) and one boutique winery.   The tasting could not have been any better and we sat out on the terrace and tasted 7 wines, most very expensive.  We loved hearing about the process and were glad not to have an ascot wearing snooty wine expert but we did learn that people do tip the tour guides (sorry Doug).

Alex loved it so much he said he wanted to get a house there.  That is his "go to" line when he likes somewhere.  Jen wants to move there and Alex wants to buy a house there.

Onto a great dinner in Sausalito right on the water (literally on pilings).  The Trident was awesome and our waiter was really cool and had a great NY accent and impression.   Great way to cap off our SF stay.

MONDAY--Jen and I went for a walk at Blackies Pasture and this time went past a bunch of houses right on the water that were worth 6-10 mil,  Really nice and I am sure Alex would want to buy one there,  Got back and "folded" the flag up for moving and off to lunch in San Francisco on our way to drop off Jessee and Alex at the airport.  Not a ton of planning went into this trip and we ended up stopping at Golden Gate bridge to try and find a place to eat where we could actually park the 62 footer and get a "Full House" picture of the Flag in front of the bridge (by the way, i am whistling "..everywhere you go").  Very easy to navigate San Fran with the Rig (NOT) but ended up eating at a cafe.

Now to the airport to drop off guests.  Following signs that say no trucks and thinking about low overpasses, we pulled right up front to departures (Jessee and Alex were a little late-Shocker).  Said good bye and headed to LA.  

The next part of our trip was pretty uneventful until we entered LA county from US 5.  It felt like we were re-entering the atmosphere from a shuttle from outer space.  I felt like at anytime we would actually break apart.  Picked an RV park in Malibu and did not arrive until 9 PM but got in and settled.   Holy crap, we are right on to the water and the park is really nice.  Most likely we will be kicked out because they have a "do not leave dogs in RV alone" policy and we are going to do that everyday.  Sorry but I have been kicked out of better places (Buffalo Wild Wings).

Sorry about the double day but had a long drive yesterday.  Tuesday- Explore, Trick or treat at mansions with Glenn, Wed-James Corden Show and then dinner with Eric and Lisa.  Thursday, Maybe a cookout with friends at campground unless we get kicked out.

Shout out to Spez and Sabs for finally figuring out how to get good grades in College.  4 years is a charm.

NAPA and the IPA Festival in Jan. PART 1

Ok, in San Fran, got Alex and Jessee and going to NAPA today.  I want to immediately apologize to all my followers because I did not write my blog today and combined two days.  It was so hectic and we had a lot going through so I hope this will make up for it.  Alex is like Beema with his “diet” and ordering at a restaurant.  If you budget for 1 hr lunch, add 15 min for ordering, re-confirming and odd questions.  We all got ready to go (Jen, Alex and John to RV bathroom) and Jessee to RV bathroom. Cold shower for Jessee because either someone switched off hot water heater or it does not work.  Once again, walked into my bedroom to find a buck naked women and it did not benefit me at all.   We (Alex and myself) went to shower in RV park shower.  Very nice set up and we were able to Picasso see each other through the glass.  The nice thing is we were both whistling “Oh Susanna.”  It was like Alcatraz but at least it was not COLD.   Got in car (Jeep) on way to NAPA of course late to our tour.  Side note---Jessee and Alex (although we love them) are so Fucking so (sorry Aunt Mary) it is crazy, more on this later.  The Jeep does not go fast and bounces around like you are on the Baha 1000.  Not the car you want to be in when you are running late.  The kind of car you want to be when you are headed to the beach ½ mile from your house.  Gas mileage is not great either which will play a role later. 

Alex makes a verbal contract pledge stating, (and I am using quotes)”I 100 percent consent to any sex acts against me today on the way to the wine tasting at Mondavi and the IPA drink festival."  I also second the consent and on the way we go, late and on the phone trying to change our appointment to 30 min later.  Score, we were able to change which ended up being great because we met Doug, our awesome tour guide.   Randal met us and Doug showed us the vineyard in a no nonsense (no ascot) point of view and it was great.  We learned that “wines are made to be drunk not stored and there are 3 rules to tasting:  Smell first, swirl hard and smell again and if it is not bad, drink it.  Now to enjoy the wine.  1.  Take a sip and let your body start to reject the taste.  2. Wait 45 sec and take a sip and swish it around for 4 sec and feel taste cells in mouth.  3 Take a third sip and your body knows it’s coming and you will enjoy the wine that much more.  It was truly unbelievable and Jen always wanted to take me there.  I had a great time. 

Now onto the IPA fest in downtown NAPA.  Got in car, found parking, went trick or treating (they were doing a business T or T) with Jen getting candy at every door step.  1030 main street Napa,  CA---nothing going on but ran into a guy that runs a local winery that was at festival also.   Oh, wrong date not oct but Jan?   Great!  Good planning Jessee and Jen!   Went to local pub and Alex and I drank 6 beers (we called it a flight).     Good IPA event and onto BLNAPA where the vineyard is a little different.  Tried Judd’s Hill winery, on the other side of the tracks and it was “good.”  Home via Muir beach and a short .38 mile hike (Aly and Ty would have loved it).  Then to try and by an outdoor fire pit at REI.  You see you cannot have “open” fires in the county that almost all burned down 1 week ago.  Day late, dollar short.  We got chicken, steak and cool veges.  Drank a few IPA’s with Alex and the girls (Lupe and Dora-Jen was asleep).  Never cooked marshmallows.  Cannot do 2 days in 1 so will do part 2 NAPA.   

Blah, blah, blah IPA

Woke up in San Fran to a full blown tongue bath and not from Jen.  You would think after a while they would stop licking but they don’t.  Made my side of the bed and then took an awesome walk at Blackie’s Pasture at Pam’s recommendation.  What an unbelievable 6 miler.  Weird people though; not Salt Lake City weird but not very friendly or very pre-occupied with something other than saying hello or even making eye contact.  We tried to say hello to everyone and only one lady almost gave us a smile but I think she just may have had gas.  Spez could not have walked along the trail or would have stopped every ten feet to pet or snuggle a dog.  If I was a dog, I would want to be born in CA.  I have never seen so much attention to dogs.  I love my dogs but they are dogs.   I had to take a piss so bad and was panning like I was looking for a snake for a place to pee but did not want to get arrested.  Ended up in a market where we were able to pee and look at awesome filets we planned on having for dinner that night.  Even with the delays, still at 15:05 per mile.  I did talk to Jen about our fight the previous night and how every time we argue for some reason, I go into a weird mode.  I think, what would Tyrone do in this situation?  I have felt this way for a long time and always do this (but never told Jen).   Tyrone was my hero at 22 (he was 18) when he got into a fight with Ali and she told him to do X, Y or Z and he said, screw you, I will do what I want and opened up another beer (which he did not need).  Eventually, Ali would come to her senses and they would make up, but for the 10 hours T- bone was doing exactly what he wanted to do.  I told this to Jen and said, last night I almost came home and opened up a beer and did my thing, like Tyrone would do (I ended up not doing but could have).  Jen said, well you have grown up a bit, but I am no Ali!

I found and bought IPA beer called BLAH, BLAH, BLAH which is my blog idea (thank you Jessee).  Anyway, headed to San Fran, the place I had only been once almost 26 years ago.  You see, Jen trapped me and left to go west to spawn our child, Kasey, and made me follow her.  I did and came to pick her up and bring her back to the east coast and start the unbelievable life I have about this time 26 years ago.  I remember it like it was yesterday and would not give up any of it for all the money in the world.  Not many people know this about us as I was in college at Albany and drove Jen back in her crappy Subaru to begin our life.  What a decision and what a good one! 

Oh, Shout out to little Alex for asking to be shouted out to. 

Everyone in CA drives in your freak’n blind spot.  In NY these people would all be dead or have right front damage to their cars.   The Golden Gate Bridge is awesome and we drove downtown to pick up Jessee and Alex and go to Alcatraz.  We went to a foo foo lunch (5 star) that ended up being great).  They had farm to market meat that is hand fed, massaged before slaughter and listens to classical music until their demise.  The food was great and out waiter (male) had painted nails that matched my toe nails (welcome to San Fran).  And, the tour was great and I was glad to go, especially with Jen, who loves prisons.  Took a “Cellfie” in a Cell (Jessee) and even farted in the “hole” with a bunch of people in there. 

For some reason, I am whistling 80-90’s sitcom theme songs and old commercials (I am stuck on band-aids and band-aids are stuck on me).  I don’t know why and maybe some 70’s in there but you know whistling is a lost art.  Also, I always have the need to have my top right shoulder scratched.  Not sure why but it is always that point.   Jen is getting sick of doing this for me. 

Went for a nice walk on the Golden Gate Bridge park and cooked some really nice steaks tonight.  Headed to NAPA tomorrow and cannot wait. Wine and an IPA Beer festival.  You could not write a better script for me.  I hope a get a good grade?